Fifty Shades of Grey

Yap. I saw the movie. Cuddled between tons of couples I went with one of my classmates.
Never ever (and I love going to the movies, so I have a feeling for this) have I seen so many people in theatres. Of course, 90% were couples of every age and everything was sold out! (Luckily I had taken care of this and did a reservation).
… And just for the record: Everyone said I won’t watch this pornographic film – yeah, sure. Kind of everyone in Frankfurt was in theatres!

Everyone’s question would be: “Is this film what you’ve expected?”
Yes and No, because I haven’t read the books and my expectations were lower as low, because I had honestly not really a clue how much “S&M” and stupid lip biting would await me.

I guess everyone is familiar with the plot, so I skip that part (Everyone who isn’t: Anastasia Steele meets hot Billionaire (?) Christian Grey and they have a really strange relationship and there are some whips and pain involved. And he’s kinda control freak.)

Okay, first of all the things that were really weird or annoying.

  1.  Christian Grey has no Sex-face, he just has the emotions of a stone. No idea if this is what the author wanted but while Anastasia is all into it and groaning and so on he’s like all “Business-face” on. And after the second or third time I’ve noticed: He makes no noise. None. At all. Wow, that’s called self-control.
  2.  He smiles twice. Only twice.Yeah, sure, he’s a dark and twisted man and so on but seriously? He look’s so much better smiling.
  3.  She is biting her lip.Constantly. You could make a drinking game out of this. Every time she bites her lip you’ll having a shot and be drunk after twenty minutes. I’m sorry but it looks just so unnatural (He’s totally into that annoying habit of hers) or just very poorly acted out. I’m not sure.
  4.  The Chemistry. This was an important part of the movie, if there is no chemistry the movie won’t work. I really tried to find it … somewhere, because Jamie Dornan is doubtless a really hot-looking guy and Dakota Johnson is lovely … but together? Didn’t work for me. He just had to look at her and she was all groany and ecstatic. (Yes, very realistic.) And he was, mostly, just staring and being unapproachable. The sex scenes, there were about … five? of them, seemed like she’s having way too much pleasure (unrealistic) and he’s a cold stone, just expressionless doing his thing. It was just weird. I know, this isn’t supposed to be a romantic movie but the whole soundtrack was cosy and cuddly, while they both had weird sex (And I don’t mean that S&M is weird, I mean just the way it was filmed, I guess?)
  5.  Some parts of the plot make no sense or at least no senseto me. After having fun in his playroom and being stalked by him (Anastasia went to see her mom, guess who was surprisingly there, too) she fights with him that she wants more. He’s all “I-don’t-do-boyfriend-and-normal” again and she asks why and he is all mysterious about the answer and so on …. and then: She has a rather brilliant idea (Attention! Irony). “Show me the worst. Show me and I’ll understand.” I don’t get that idea. At all.
    So, getting hit by a belt six times while you’re sobbing and crying is going to show you … what? I don’t get it. Sorry.

BUT, there were some parts that weren’t bad at all.

  1. Scenes that made me actually laugh not out of awkwardness but out of the joke he or she made. That was nice. So I hadn’t to wear my “That’s-weird”-face the whole 125 Minutes.
  2. The Soundtrack. I know, that’s cheesy but I really, really liked the songs (who doesn’t like Frank Sinatra or Beyoncé?)
  3. Everything was staged very aesthetically. Every shot was like a painting (I’ll admit: There is a scene where she’s just wearing a blanket, standing next to the piano he’s playing and these huge windows, showing the skyline of Seattle. I’m sorry, I would totally want to paint that!) and the whole colour palette was decent and tasteful, as if the tone of the movie should be represented in the way of the colours.
  4. The first twenty minutes were actually nice. I had fun watching them, but then everything turned weird. Sometimes, Christian was all normal and nice and sweet and boyfriend-like and that was cute. (Maybe I’m not into good-looking stone-faces while getting whipped.)

Unfortunately, I couldn’t watch the last five minutes or so, because we both had to get our train home (The film ended about an hour after midnight and I wanted to be home  at 2 am.) Guess what, they split up. (That’s at least what happens in the books. I googled it on my way home :D)

I don’t know if I would watch it again. Of course, there were scenes where I just had to awkwardly laugh but all in all it wasn’t nearly as bad as I’ve expected it to be.

Have you seen the movie, yet? Will you watch it? I’m curious what everyone else out there might be thinking 🙂

Images via here and here and here.


9 thoughts on “Fifty Shades of Grey

  1. I watched it on Friday and as far as I can remember it was very much like the book – nothing really happens lol. The books weren’t that amazing either but I think I’ll go and see the second film if they make it, more out of curiosity than anything. Their ‘business meeting’ about the contract was one of the funniest things I’ve seen though!

    Christian is supposed to be really stony faced and unresponsive, though in the book he’s even worse. It gets a bit annoying so I’m glad they made him a bit more light hearted in the film.

    Liked by 1 person

    • oh, he’s worse in the books??? WOW! I mean I liked him really, when he was normal and smiling and nice… 😀 And yes, that’s true. The business meeting was really good. (I was kind of relieved that she went home though ;D)

      Liked by 1 person

      • I read them a long time ago but I don’t think he makes any jokes or smiles that much at all. I’m glad she went home too! I don’t think I could have dealt with another weird sex scene..

        Liked by 1 person

      • hahaahhaah! but isn’t it weird though that the were so many couples? I mean if I’m in a relationship I wouldn’t want to watch this with my boyfriend while he’s getting all uncomfortable? But the couple next to us was cuddling if this was a katherine-heigl-movie … weird

        Liked by 1 person

      • I went to a late viewing so there weren’t that many people there. I went with my cousin and her boyfriend but they weren’t cuddling or anything.. It’s not really a romantic film. I’m not really sure what sort of film it is :p

        Liked by 1 person

  2. I saw the film this Friday, and I was surprised by the editing because it is been so long since I read the book.four instance, I forgotten how stonefaced Christian was, so the sex scenes did read a little weird. One thing I was happy with the film was that we didn’t have to hear Anastasia’s annoying inner dialogue. Her character appeared smarter in the film then in the books.

    Liked by 1 person

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